WEEK 3 OF THE BACHELOR THE ONLY 10 THOUGHTS THAT MATTER!! Lots of crying in the previews I love it.
1.) Colton hasn’t changed in two weeks. He’s literally worn this outfit for two straight weeks I respect it.
2.) Does every date he gives say let’s fall in love I swear, nothing says let’s fall in love like bungy jumping. White shorts are a cocky choice Tayshia don’t piss yourself. RED SUIT ROCKET TO SUNSET MAKING OUT IN THE WATER!! LIVE LOOK AT HER STOCK 🚀🚀🚀🚀. Her ex husband can not be happy watching this, tough, tough look for him. She does have a great smile good observation Colton.
3.) Demi is unraveling, she thinks she has a chance. I want Pshyco sexual Demi, let the favorites run their race, you just keep gunning for bachelor in paradise Demi. There you go Demi back to your roots piggy backs on the group date knew you didn’t change. Her mom being in federal prison is about right on par. That group date rose is confusing though.
4.) Cassie is so god damn gorgeous. Still my favorite even though she hasn’t gotten a lot of camera time, I would say red is your color but every color is your color sweetheart. Literally slays every outfit, and a joke making Colton laugh! MY FUCKING QUEEN PAINT BABY PAINT ❤️
5.) Hannah B looks like she’s back in the race but after that make out she’s back down in the rankings. She was really eating some face and I wasn’t about it. Some people will call it bias but I’ve seen about 45 make outs in 3 weeks so I’m getting good at picking out the bad ones.
6.) Courtney sucks, boo hoo your boyfriend who’s dating 14 other girls doesn’t pay attention to you?! I wouldn’t even pay attention to you if you were my only girlfriend. Zing.
7.) Caelynn gets another 1 on 1 quiet weak for Hannah G, and Cassie. Ugh she could in first place after this week, fuck she is so hot. Unwrapping all the gifts in front of the girls is laugh out loud funny, just savage move. She made Cassie cry she’s on my shit list now, baby girl don’t cry I’m here. Green dress is a 9/10 could’ve went for the jugular on the other girls if she went deep in her bag. Jesus Christ, what a fucked up story what the fuck is wrong with people. As much as we make fun of him Colton is genuinely a good dude.
8.) Back to unserious stuff, Hannah G absolutely says daddy give me the fucking rose with that dress. Wow, looking like a 10/10 pink dresses Barbie doll. She gets him first of course, Brady you’re so good at this. Hannah G gets in his bed and wants to open up to him so he knows her better. They proceeded to make out for 20 minutes in bed. I fucking love this show 😂 love it Colton.
9.) Caelynn bringing the rose to with her to talk to Hannah B is funny and petty as fuck. I hate that they made up, I need rivals ladies. Courtney and Demi beef is the most irrelevant beef ever, gosh how are we going to get over two girls outside the top 10 fighting. BOOOO HISS. Demi with the rose in her mouth right next to Courtney yes girl.
10.) Rose ceremony time, Hannah G first no surprise got some sack time with Colton. Heather nice to see you, forgot you were here but your safe, same with you Kirpa, Katie too, boring. Hannah B with a bounce back episode and she’s safe. Elise fell back a little this week she’s too mature for this show. Cassie waited way too long for her rose but she gets one and that’s a nice black dress for my queen. Nicole safe, and Courtney goes home along with Tracy, don’t come for Demi and miss ladies both her rivals gone. CASSIE GETS A ONE ON ONE NEXT WEEK LETS FUCKING GO.
11.) Power rankings 1.) Caelynn can’t deny this one it sucks. 2.) Hannah G is one of the prettiest girls ever created and Colton loves it. 3.) Cassie, I know you have a rocket episode in you next week babe. Let’s take this fucking thing to the moon.