IN NEED OF A RETIRED COLLEGE KICKER

Yes, it’s Thursday and we are still talking about kicking here in Chicago. If you haven’t heard already Goose Island is offering fans a chance to kick a 43 yard field goal this Saturday for a chance to win free beer for a year. Yes, you read that correct FREE BEER FOR A YEAR. So what does a mediocre athlete like myself think when I see this? “I need to befriend a retired kicker so they can win us some beers!!”. Think about how much money we could save, not having to worry about going to Binny’s Beverage Depot (AD PLUG) every 5 days for a beer run.

After reviewing the rules Goose Island laid down, the only thing I have a problem with is the “ALL GOOSE ISLAND REFEREE CALLS ARE FINAL” seems like a grey area in which they could make this contest damn near impossible. For all you know they could call fictional “time outs” every time somebody makes the kick, and have them kick it again. But because I’m smart, I’ve thought of this. I’m looking for a kicker with consistency, you have to be able to knock it through the uprights at least 3-4 times in a row at 43 for us to walk out champions. Another added plus, my apartment is a short 14 minute drive from Fulton St Brewery, and if you plan on flying into O’Hare I’m a short walk from the Blue Line Logan Square stop. I am currently accepting applications, and if it’s not too much to ask please throw in a kicking montage or game film which will increase your chances immensely. LETS WIN SOME FREE BEER!!!!!!!!

Ps Brady somehow went 3-2 last night and didn’t have to drink his own pee, talk about a guy who DOESN’T EVER LOSE #FREEMONEY

By: Marcus Fitzpatrick

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